White Roses
by Eternally-Yours-24
Summary: I want to be just like her, Pink thought, wanting her power, her grace…no, that wasn't quite right, was it?
1. Chapter 1

****This isn't exactly related to what's going on in the show at the moment, I wrote this a little while ago. I just found it again and wanted to post it.****

 ** **...****

It started out, she supposed, innocently enough.

Pink Diamond admired her. She supposed there wasn't anyone who _didn't,_ but Pink's affection went beyond the tacky worship most Gems fell into when they gazed upon White Diamond. Not that she really knew this at the time. She loved all of the Diamonds for reasons of their own, but White was always just so beautiful. Sneaking into her Moon Base when she knew she wasn't looking became one of her favorite pass times—watching the elder Diamond at work, her ivory skin and long curved nails entrancing her. _I want to be just like her,_ Pink thought, wanting her power, her grace…no, that wasn't quite right, was it?

 _I want…I want…?_

The question filled Pink Diamond with a kind of intangible frustration that was just out of the reach of her yearning fingertips. It coats her tongue with a bitter taste when White glances at Yellow Diamond out of the corners of her silvery, mesmerizing eyes, and then walks past Pink without a word. Pink knows too well of jealousy, but this is far worse. It threatens to suffocate her with every second that goes by. It was a flower growing inside her, one she wants to pick right out of herself and give to White, to bare that special part of herself to the elder Diamond.

No, it wasn't just a flower, it was a whole damn garden.

" _Whiiite…"_

Pink's voice travels in the large Moon Base, bouncing off the crystal dome. The tap of her little pink shoes echo as well, jumping up and down as she tries to get the attention of the oh so lustrous White Diamond.

"Stop bouncing," White says simply, and although her words are edged, like the blade of a razor, the sound of her voice makes Pink Diamond still. Even in reproach she sounds lovely, as cool and pure as the snow that covered the ground of Pink's new colony. "It is unbecoming of a Diamond," she continues.

"I…I'm sorry," Pink mumbles, uncharacteristically bashful. The pale glittering silk of White's cape brushes the floor, the material so alluring that Pink desperately wants to run her fingers over it, but knows that might just get her shattered. But I want to touch it… she thinks anyway. "May I come up?" Pink asks verbally, and is answered with White's pointed hand descending down to her. She hops on, White lifting her up as if she were nothing more than a delicate little doll. "What are you doing?" Pink asks in slight awe, examining White's screens. Symbol unknown to human society filled their glowing slates. "Colony plans," she replies absently. Pink watches her lips, lush and exciting, as they move. A frightening heat starts within her gem and does not stop. As if controlled by that feeling alone, like a puppet on the strings of her desire, Pink reaches up without thinking…her finger comes in contact with softness she never knew existed as she traces the plump curve of White Diamond's bottom lip…

If she had any need to breathe, it would have been knocked from her as if from a blow to the middle. She was clenched tight in White's hand and tossed to the ground, where she stayed a moment, disoriented.

"Go," White hissed. "Now."

Pink Diamond looked up, up, up at her, frightened at how angry White was. But she was still so amazing. Her elegant form was blurred by Pink's tears, welling up in her eyes.

"I…" she began, another apology so close to being stuttered out. "This behavior will not be tolerated, Pink," White Diamond says, quietly, and this sends her away without another word.

 _I want to touch her face…even if it's just for a moment…_

Thankfully White Diamond doesn't see the tears that begin to fall. Large, ugly drops that pour down Pink's cheeks, and she has to swallow down the lump that forms in her throat. The tickle grows with such urgency that Pink coughs, only half surprised at the petal that falls from her lips. She caught it quickly before it floated delicately to the floor. It's beautiful, velvety and _white_ —of course—and Pink curls her fingers and feels it crumble in her palm from the pressure.

 _Flowers blooming from the cracks of her gem. The vines curling around the glittering stone, growing, until the bouquet is as wonderful as it is tragic._

…

She doesn't let it interfere with her work. How would all her Gems feel, knowing their Diamond was constantly choking on the whole white roses that were fluttering in her windpipe? Pink could taste them, usually, sickeningly sweet and coppery behind her teeth. She worried they could smell them when she spoke, her breath reeking of heartache and unrequited love, one so sour all Gems would feel her pain if they caught a whiff. She had been lucky so far, concealed in the privacy of her palanquin when she spits the flowers up, ones sparkling like…like diamonds.

She laughs to keep from sobbing until she's numb.

…

"Pink."

There is a difference in White Diamond's tone this time. It is, in fact, the first time she spoke to Pink Diamond since the incident. She jumps, hiding the still-wet flowers that had just cascaded over her tongue, feeling like shards of glass on her throat as she gagged on them. Flowers. Not petals. Flowers. Evidence of the slow but steady progression of this disease. She threw them to the ground and stamped them with her foot before turning to White, taking in her magnificence. Flora swirled and itched within her belly.

"The others have been questioning the quality of your work ethic," the taller Diamond tells her blankly. "Spending a lot of time alone, I've heard. How is your colony progressing?"

"The Kindergartens are now incubating," Pink Diamond recited. "My experiment we discussed shall be emerging soon, and…" _I love you, White._ The confession is pushing at her from behind the professional words. She wants to reveal the flower she hides, to show what White has been doing to her. She knew it might all stop if she did but she simply does not have the courage. "…Everything is running smoothly," Pink finished after a moment.

White Diamond nods proudly and Pink's heart aches for her just a bit more.

…

 _Sharpened claws run up the defined lines of Yellow Diamond's jawline. The lips that Pink longed to feel again are smiling, genuine, which is rare. The massive beings are standing close, nearly pressing against each other, their shadows looming on the walls behind them in the dim light. One would think that they were about to kiss but they dance instead, swaying to otherworldly music only they can hear._

Pink is curled up with the gauzy curtains on her palanquin drawn. She sent everyone away, her Pearl, her guards. The Gems protested at leaving her alone but she hardly payed them any mind. She knew they would obey her anyway. The wind is gentle, cooling the hot tears that glistened in Pink's mournful eyes. That living thing inside her is flourishing faster than her emotions can even keep pace with. It is far too late to do anything about it now, and she wishes she could just forget.

The pain is great when the last one comes, a lonely wilted rose which she lets fall to the floor. It will always remind her of the strong, sharp-edged Diamond that _she_ fell in love with.

" _She doesn't love me back."_


	2. Chapter 2

The air still thrummed with that horrible song, mixing with the snarling and screeching sounds as the creatures stumbled, dazed, across the still pulsing earth. Their distorted shadows flickered in the dimming light, a dance of the truly damned. The impact rang shrilly against the surface of her shield, which had blocked her, Garnet, and Pearl from harm. _She_ did this, Pink Diamond thought as she slowly begins to process it all—but the idea does not conjure the feelings of hate that it should have. Even as she looked down into Pearl's despairing bright blue eyes she felt only numbness with that despicable longing festering just below it, making her skin crawl with utter disappointment in herself. The cold wind made her long silky dress flutter around her bare feet and legs, ringlets of hair brushing her cheeks and back, reminding her that even in this new form White Diamond still had a hold on her and simply would for the rest of her life. The pale flash of light twinkling in the sky above the other two had turned her throat dry and the tickle had reminded her of the flowers. _She's up there._ The idea that she probably didn't care that she was shattered stung deeply, knowing that White simply wanted to vanquish the rebellion. Nothing more.

Pearl's face crumpled as the creatures howled with maddening realization. Pink had promised her she would never look back, and in the end it might be the biggest lie she's ever told.

…

The men were just a distraction. They came and went, as fleeting as the seasons changing throughout the years. Greg was entertaining in his own right, and Pink never understood why that hole carved in her chest could never be completely filled by his charm. He was goofy, optimistic, and utterly fascinating. Yet when his hands crawled over her body the tan skin would often turn ivory, smooth fingers lengthening to claw-like nails, and she would have to physically shake her head to banish the sight. She'd recoil, nearly thumping her head on the ceiling of the cramped van they'd pack themselves into, Greg's hurt face bringing a tidal wave of guilt to clash with her disgust.

" _This behavior will not be tolerated, Pink."_

"Is something wrong, Rose?" he'd ask, and she would fabricate a false gentle smile just for him. "Of course not, darling," she purred softly, leaning down to fit her mouth to his, mainly to silence him. The acts would resume without much more hesitation. Later the awkward pause would be nearly forgotten. Pink Diamond plunged her fingers into his long locks of dark hair, her mind screaming at her to _FORGET HER FORGET HER FORGET HER,_ taunting her with the knowledge that she was breaking her own vows. Still the warmth of his human lips would turn cold. In her mind White Diamond loved Rose Quartz in ways she never did Pink, and she'd be putty in her arms within seconds.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Universe," she whispered into the night once, but he was too far into the deep hollows of sleep at that point to hear her.

…

"Steven, if the baby is a boy," Greg said with certainty. Pink Diamond smiled at his enthusiasm, at this game they were playing. She touched her distended abdomen. At times she thought that she could almost feel the delicate life growing inside, inside her. Soon she would bring a human being into this precious world. It was such a special, wonderful ability, even if it meant sacrificing herself. This baby would certainly take the place of the dead flowers that she could still feel within her, so wilted they were papery husks of themselves, nearly ash, but far more poisonous than when they were blooming.

White could not have given you this, she told herself, but even this brought a nagging worm of doubt. But since the baby she could trick herself into believing she thought about the Diamond less. So maybe this was a step in the right direction after all.

"I love that name," Pink said with a smile.

" _He's ours," White Diamond whispered in approval, running a single finger over the roundness of her belly. Pink felt her face flush as she gazed into those silvery eyes. White was glowing, her magnificence appearing almost like a living thing created in all the colors reflecting off of her._

Pink Diamond gave him a kiss. She shivered.

…


End file.
